A Tale of Two Stations

This week, we present this installiment of The Quantum Argonauts on time, after what happened last week.

If you are one of those kinds of people, you might say that the last two installiment told the tale of a very interesting week. In the first part, Cy and Conrad solved a small mystery to get over the winter doldrums and the second part had Cy cure Conrad of a bout of sleepwalking. Now, we come to the third and final part, the events of Friday.

We now journey to Hyperion...

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The early morning sun rises over Hyperion and the people who inhabit this fair burg are stirring from their night of sleep. One of those inhabitants is Cy and Conrad's mutual friend, Polly.
Polly, being the niece of the police chief, has earned her a job within the ranks of the Hyperion P.D. As Polly stirs today, she thinks in her head of her dream, which she logs away until next time.
A quick shower and a bite to eat and Polly is walking her way to the police station, to begin her day. The sounds of the early morning filled the air as Polly makes her day down the street.
As she nears the police station, she meets up with Cy, out enjoying the morning as he bikes his way to work.
"Good morning, Polly." says Cy as he pulls alongside her.
"Good morning, Cy." says Polly.
"Hear that morning music in the air." says Cy.
"What music?" asks Polly.
"The sounds of the birds as they tweet their wake-up calls. The wind blowing across the street. I tell ya, it reminds me of all those mornings in New York. The song's different but the melody's the same." says Cy.
"A guy like you never belonged in the city." says Polly.
"I made the most of it, Polly. My mother often wished to escape the city." says Cy.
"You did it for her." says Polly.
"Thank you, Polly." says Cy as they arrive in front of the police station.
"Here's where I get off." says Polly.
"See you later, Polly." says Cy, continuing by Polly on his way to work.
"What a guy Cy is." says Polly, who then walks up to the front of the police station and goes inside.
"Good morning, Polly." says Officer Grace as Polly enters.
"Good morning, Officer Grace." says Polly.
"Another day of work." says Officer Grace.
"What other kind of work is there?" says Polly as she takes hold of her mop and bucket.
"I guess you're right. I saw you talking to Cy as you walked up." says Officer Grace.
"Can you believe that he once lived in New York City?" asks Polly.
"I never do. Then again, what he did for me a while back I'll never forget either." says Officer Grace.
As the Friday morning sun rises over Hyperion, Cy is biking his way to work, as usual. The early winter chill is begun to set in and frost again covers the ground. Cy is wearing a winter coat to bat off the cold. Tire marks are being left by the bike as it moves over the frost covered ground. It makes a line that leads to the radio station as Cy parks his bike.
Cy then enters the radio station, shaking off the cold as he does. Cy takes off his winter coat and then makes his way to the green room. When he gets there, he finds Conrad reading a magazine.
"Good morning, Conrad." says Cy as he enters the green room.
"Good morning, Cy." says Conrad, still reading.
"Ready for another Friday of recording for our weekend show?" asks Cy.
"I feel ready. We just need a story to stage." says Conrad.
"And then throw things over to Prairie Home Companion." says Cy.
"Seems odd the scheduling of our weekend show." says Conrad.
"Only because Mr. Gold wouldn't give us our original slot of 5:15 pm." says Cy.
"That is true." says Conrad.
"Mr. Gold would then have to think up two 15-minute programs, and he doesn't have the time, what with promoting Barry & Terry." says Cy.
"Lay off today. Besides, we have nothing to worry about." says Conrad.
"According to Mr. Gold's latest ratings, our weekend show is at the bottom of the ratings chart." says Cy.
"That's true." says Conrad.
"Mr. Gold runs the ratings service, and we're Barry & Terry's rivals. If we appear to have bad ratings, he'll eventually throw us off the air and Barry and Terry can rule the air uncompeted." says Cy.
"You don't really believe that." says Conrad.
"I do, and it's true." says Cy.
"Just don't mention it to Mr. Gold." says Conrad.
"Maybe I'll listen to you on that." says Cy.
"You better." says Conrad.
"For now, let us do our Friday morning show." says Cy.
"Hear, hear." says Conrad.
"Good morning, Officer Baker, and good morning, Polly." says Chief McIntyre back at the police station.
"Good morning, sir." says Officer Grace.
"Good morning, unc." says Polly.
"Polly, getting right at your work, as usual." says Chief McIntyre.
"I never fail." says Polly.
Chief McInytre walks over to the radio and turns it on. The sounds of WHYP fill the air as Cy and Conrad's competitors, Barry & Terry, take the mic to start their morning show.
Polly ignores the radio as she continues to mop the floor. Meanwhile, more members of the Hyperion Police Department walk into the building. An hour into Polly's shift, a call comes into the squad room.
"Hello?" says Officer Grace as she picks up the phone, then hears the other end and after a minute or two, she hangs up, "I've got a report of an attempted rape and murder."
"Officer Baker, can you field this one?" asks Chief McInytre.
"I can." says Officer Grace, who then walks out of the police station.
"While Officer Grace deals with big crime, I'll think I'll patrol for small crime." says Officer Timmy.
"You do that, Officer Matthews." says Chief McInytre as he retreats into his office.
"Have a nice day." says Polly as Officer Timmy walks out the door.
"My beat, my town." says Officer Timmy an hour later as he makes his way down the street.
Officer Timmy makes his way down the main part of the city as the sun shines down from the eastern area of the sky. As Officer Timmy reaches one of the storefront, he hears a conversation between two people.
"You know that wape that went down yestewday was aww mine." says a man in a cajun accent, dressed in a plaid shirt, carrying a fiddle case in his arm.
"You did?" says a woman.
"I did. I admit whoweheawtedwy." says the man.
"All right, mac. Come with me." says Officer Timmy as he walks over to the two.
"What's the pwobwem, officew?" asks the man.
"I heard you confess to that wape, I mean rape." says Officer Timmy.
"I knew that I wouwd face the waw soonew ow latew." says the man.
"That's true." says Officer Timmy as he snaps handcuffs on the man and takes his fiddle case.
"See ya latew, honey." says the man as he's lead away.
"You're gonna see justice." says Officer Timmy.
"Officew, if you must know, I didn't do anything." says the man.
"Tell it to the judge." says Officer Timmy.
"Honestwy, officew, I did not do a thing." says the man.
"Do me a favor and stop talking like Elmer Fudd." says Officer Timmy.
"But.. " says the man before being interupted.
"But nothing. I know you're faking that speech inpediment to gain my sympathy. Well, it's not working." says Officer Timmy.
The two walk their way to the police station.
"But officew, I'm tewwing the twuth." says the man.
"I know you awe." says Officer Timmy, mocking the man.
"Officer Timmy, what have you done?" asks Polly.
"I got the rapist. He isn't so smart. He confessed to it and he talks in that stupid Elmer Fudd voice, not to mention carrying around his weapon, hidden inside the usual violin case." says Officer Timmy.
"His name is Elmer, and he does play the fiddle." says Polly.
"Elmer?" says Officer Timmy.
"That's what I'm twying to teww you." says Elmer.
"But he confessed to it." says Officer Timmy.
"Was Elmer talking to a lady when he confessed?" asks Polly.
"Yes." says Officer Timmy.
"He likes to confess that he's done various crimes to impress women." says Polly.
"You're kidding?" says Officer Timmy.
"You know, Powwy, I've cweaned my own cwimes fow yeaws." says Elmer.
"I see it now." says Officer Timmy.
"Elmer, would you like to stay for the day?" asks Polly.
"Oh, boy, yes. I get to be a assistant." says Elmer.
"Uncuff him and give him back his case." says Polly.
"Okay." says Officer Timmy, who then uncuffs Elmer.
"What do I do fiwst, Powwy?" asks Elmer.
"Sit in that chair and watch me." says Polly.
"Okay, Powwy." says Elmer, sitting in a chair by a desk.
"I gotta get back to my beat." says Officer Timmy, who then walks out the door.
"I heard something in here." says Chief McIntyre, coming out of his office.
"Hewwo, Chief McIntywe." says Elmer.
"Hello to you, Elmer. Who brought you in this time?" says Chief McIntyre.
"Officew Timmy." says Elmer.
"Well, did you brief him on Elmer, Polly?" asks Chief McIntyre.
"Yes, sir." says Polly.
"I guess you've got a assistant today, Polly." says Chief McIntyre.
"That I am." says Elmer.
"If you're good today, I might pay you." says Chief McIntyre.
"That wouwd be gweat." says Elmer.
A couple of hours later, after Cy and Conrad have ended another week of their morning shows, the two enter the green room with interested faces.
"Now that our morning show is over, we need to come up with our weekend show, which records at 5:15 pm today." says Cy.
"I know that." says Conrad.
"I just wanted to see if you remember." says Cy.
"I have no idea. What we need is a small story." says Conrad.
"Why don't we just give up on a theater show and do one of our exciting topic shows." says Cy.
"What topic could we possibly do?" asks Conrad.
"That's been our trouble lately. We've gone through all the good topics." says Cy.
"I know, it's getting serious." says Conrad.
"Is there any topics you can think of right now?" asks Cy.
"Not really. Maybe you have one." says Conrad.
"I never actually thought we ever used the back-up topic I selected the day we got this show." says Cy.
"Not your afterschool special idea." says Conrad.
"Those program that children saw monthly on the three networks used a fair amount of science fiction and it would be interesting to discuss if any of those stories influenced any of today's best science fiction writers, actors, or directors." says Cy.
"Maybe to you, but we've never been in the spot to use it." says Conrad.
"I guess we're now in that spot." says Cy.
"I'm not gonna do it." says Conrad.
"Why?" asks Cy.
"Because I have no knowledge of the subject." says Conrad.
"I know as much as I do." says Cy.
"Our childhoods don't count." says Conrad.
"You've watched the tapes I have of those specials." says Cy.
"I'm still not doing it." says Conrad.
"Wait a minute, I have an idea just now." says Cy.
"What is it?" asks Conrad.
"For a story we can do." says Cy.
"Do you have one?" asks Conrad.
"One that I've been working on, called 'Mars 3'." says Cy.
"What's it about?" asks Conrad.
"It's about two people who make a journey to the landing site of the old Soviet probe Mars 3." says Cy.
"Just two people?" asks Conrad.
"Just two. Me and you can play the parts and we can use our sound man and our announcer for the production without cutting into next week's production." says Cy.
"That's a great idea. Just one question: where's the story?" says Conrad.
"It's at my house. I write it up a while ago but I never had a chance to suggest it. It's in my curios cabinet." says Cy.
"I know where that is. I'll go over to your house and get it for you." says Conrad.
"Why do this for me?" asks Cy.
"Because you need to call up our sound man and announcer." says Conrad.
"I guess I have no choice." says Cy.
Conrad then makes his way out of the green room. As he starts to walk down the hallway, he bumps into Joanne and a lady friend, a young raven-haired woman, dressed in sloppy clothes.
"Oh, hello, Joanne." says Conrad.
"How you be, Conrad?" asks Joanne.
"Fine. I'm just on my way to Cy's house to get something for the show." says Conrad.
"Is it important?" asks Joanne.
"Very." says Conrad, who then continues down the hallway.
Joanne and her friend then walk into the green room, where Cy is busy looking around the room.
"Hello, Cy." says Joanne.
"Joanne! My belle," says Cy as he walks over to her, "Who's this with you?"
"This is my friend, Louisa." says Joanne.
"Charmed to meet you, Louisa." says Cy.
"He's as nice as you told me." says Louisa.
"I hope I am." says Cy.
"Can you believe me now?" says Joanne to Louisa.
"I do." says Louisa.
"Well, I do come from a great background." says Cy.
"That's right, Joanne. You told me that Cy is the son of some actress." says Louisa.
"Her name was Debralee Scott, and she was more than an actress to me. She was my mother." says Cy.
"Is that even true?" asks Louisa.
"What's true?" asks Cy.
"That your mother is Debralee Scott, whoever she is." says Louisa.
"Don't belittle my mother, and don't question that she was. I know she was. I came from her and I spent twenty-one years alongside her." says Cy.
"I don't know. Joanne told me about your silver tongue." says Louisa.
"I never use it to lie about my own mother. I think I know who she was." says Cy.
"Convince me." says Louisa.
"Later. First, I have to make a few phone calls." says Cy as he goes back to looking around the room.
"What are you looking for?" asks Joanne.
"The phone." says Cy.
"Is this it?" says Louisa as she points to the phone sitting on a table along the far wall in the room.
"I see it now." says Cy as he then heads over to the phone.
"And you think you know who your mother is." says Louisa.
"I'm not gonna into this arguement." says Cy as he dials a number on the phone and picks up the receiver.
A few rings later, an answer is heard at the other end.
"Who is it?" asks the voice.
"This is Cy, Chester." says Cy.
"What do you want?" asks Chester.
"I need you to come in and do some sound effects." says Cy.
"What for?" asks Chester.
"We needed a topic for today and I suggested that we do a play I've been writing." says Cy.
"Is it a big play?" asks Chester.
"No. It only stars Conrad and me and we need only a small amount of sound effects." says Cy.
"I guess I could swing it." says Chester.
"Great. I'll see you over here." says Cy, who then hangs up the phone.
"What are you guys doing?" asks Joanne.
"Didn't Conrad tell you when you were in the hallway?" asks Cy.
"How do you know that?" asks Louisa.
"I have an inner clock, more accurate than others. I know that Conrad left at the same time you came in and you two had some talk to account for the small delay." says Cy.
"Maybe there's something to the truth about his heritage." says Louisa.
"My mother did tell me to tell time the way I do." says Cy.
"Whoever she was." says Louisa.
"You seem to believe that I don't know who my own mother is." says Cy.
"Well, it seems a little hard to believe." says Louisa.
"Well, I've known it all my life." says Cy.
"So you say." says Louisa.
"Now cut it out! I know who my mother is and it is who I say it is because it is the God's honest truth." says Cy.
"I'm gonna need something to convince me of your heritage." says Louisa.
"Like what?" asks Cy.
"I'll know it when it happens." says Louisa.
"If you excuse me now, I need to phone the announcer." says Cy, who then walks over to the phone and dials a number.
"I wish you would take Cy at his word." says Joanne to Louisa.
"I've been with people who lie about certain things, such as their heritage, and I've learn to seek the truth if something seems that way." says Louisa.
"If you saw the two together, you would believe it." says Joanne.
"Well, she's dead, so if he's lying, he's doing it right." says Louisa.
"I believe Cy when he says who his mother is. Who would lie about one's own mother?" says Joanne.
"I need a little more convincing." says Louisa.
"To each their own." says Joanne.
Back at the police station, Elmer is on his fiddle as he plays a redition of "Cajan Fiddle" to the slight annoyence of Polly.
"Must you play that?" asks Polly, interupting Elmer's playing.
"It's the onwy thing I know to do." says Elmer, who then resumes his playing.
"Leave him alone, Polly. I kinda enjoy the music. Breaks up the monotony." says Chief McIntyre.
Chief McIntyre is then about to retreat back into his office when the front door of the police station opens up and Officer Grace walks in, with a man in handcuffs, covered in blood.
"I got the rapist/murderer, Chief." says Officer Grace.
"Great. Just process him and I'll take into the interogation room." says Chief McIntyre.
"That's a wapist?" asks Elmer, again stopping his fiddle playing.
"And a muwdewew" says Polly in Elmer's voice.
Just then, a woman, also covered in blood enters.
"Who's that?" asks Elmer.
"I believe it to be the victim." says Polly.
"But she's not dead." says Elmer.
"It was an attempted murder, Elmer." says Chief McIntyre, writing on a piece of paper at the desk where Elmer is sitting.
"That expwains it." says Elmer.
"I was told to come here and make a statement." says the woman.
"Please, sit down... " says Chief McIntyre.
"Berner, Bea Berner." says the woman.
"Elmer, please sit elsewhere." says Chief McIntyre.
"Okay." says Elmer as he gets up.
Mrs. Berner then sits down in the vacanted chair.
"Now, please tell me about what happened." says Chief McIntyre.
As Elmer sits in a new chair, Mrs. Berner begins her story, "Well, it began when I met this man at a party. I may have had a few drinks and may have flirted with him in good fun. The next day, he came to me and said I loved him. I didn't love him, I love my husband. Over the next few months, he continued to say I loved him.
"Finally, it all came to a head last night when he demanded that I leave my husband for him. I outright told him no and then he tried to rape me. When I stopped him, he then tried to kill me, saying if he couldn't have me, no one would. It's amazing I'm still alive."
"Why don't you go to the hospital?" says Chief McIntyre.
"I think I will." says Mrs. Berner, who then gets up and leaves.
"I can't bewieve it." says Elmer.
"I've never heard such a tale." says Chief McIntyre.
"Maybe you should talk to the guy." says Polly.
"I think I will." says Chief McIntyre, getting up from his chair and walking into the back of the station.
"I have an idea. Wet's go and watch it." whispers Elmer to Polly.
"I don't know." says Polly.
"I'ww be fun." says Elmer.
"Okay." says Polly, putting down her mop.
Polly and Elmer then sneak their way into the room next to the interogation room, where the other side of the two-way mirror is.
As Polly and Elmer take their places behind the glass, Chief McIntyre sits down and begins talking, "What's your name, son?"
"My name is Eddie." says the man, a 34-year-old black male with a purple button shirt and tan dress pants.
"Eddie, why don't you tell me about what happened?" asks Chief McIntyre.
Eddie then tells his side, "Well, a few months ago, at this party, Mrs. Berner came on to me. I felt that she had fallen in love with me and I told her so the next day. Well, she denied, saying she loved her husband. Over the last months, I've tried to tell her that I'm right but she refuses to listen. Finally, I go to her house and demand she leaves her husband.
"She told me she wouldn't, so I decided to show her what she's missing. When she tries to stop me, the next thing I know, I'm trying to kill her. She loses a lot of blood but that husband of hers, being a doctor, he patched her enough and then he called the cops on me."
"What a guy." says Polly.
"I don't bewieve it, again." says Elmer.
"Well, I think we'll hold you until the legal-aid attorney gets here from the courthouse. They open at 9:00 am, so I'll wait awhile." says Chief McIntyre.
Just then, another officer comes in and takes Eddie out of the room.
"I better get back to my mopping, Elmer." says Polly.
"Me, too." says Elmer as both make their way out of the room.
"How can anyone make such a mistake?" asks Elmer.
"I don't know, Elmer. I've never heard of such a case in my life." says Polly.
"Maybe the woman shouwd have woved him wike he wanted." says Elmer.
"She loves her husband." says Polly.
"Awe you suwe about that, Powwy?" asks Elmer.
"Not really, but if the woman says so." says Polly.
Just then, Chief McIntyre walks back into the main room.
"So, how did it go in there?" asks Polly.
"Oh, I'll never understand people like that." says Chief McIntyre.
"Me, neithew." says Elmer.
"Right, Elmer." says Chief McIntyre.
Just then, back at the radio station, Cy hangs up the phone and walks back over to the two ladies.
"The announcer will be here in a few. I hope that Conrad can find the script." says Cy.
"Cy, do you mind if Louisa and I stayed here for the day. I promised her that I'd show her how a radio show is made." says Joanne.
"Of course you can stay. With what we got today, you'll see how a radio play is made, at least in this day and age. If you had shown up next week, we would have shown you the old-fashioned way." says Cy.
"Cy, you believe in making radio a career in this day and age?" asks Louisa.
"Radio is on the verge of a second golden age, and I'll be there to become a radio performer." says Cy.
"Your mother, according to Joanne, was a television performer." says Louisa.
"My mother told me never to follow in her footsteps. That's why I'm not in Hollywood, in front of a camera." says Cy.
"I thought parents wanted kids to follow in their footsteps." says Louisa.
"My mother told me about her life, how her career never went too far, and that she didn't wanna see me suffer the same." says Cy.
"She must have be quite a person, if what you say is true." says Louisa.
"I like to think so." says Cy.
"I'm back." says Conrad, rushing into the room with the script in hand.
"I see you found it." says Cy.
"I did." says Conrad.
"I guess we should get to work on it." says Cy.
"Aren't you forgetting something?" asks Joanne.
"Oh, right. This is Joanne's friend, Louisa." says Cy, pointing at her.
"Nice to meet you, Louisa." says Conrad.
"She came here with me because she wants to see how a radio show is made." says Joanne.
"What are we, an educational program?" says Conrad.
"Not many people have an idea of how radio works. Since this is a quick-to-plan show, we'll give an adbridged version." says Cy as he, Conrad, Joanne, and Louisa sit down at the green room table.
"Listen, Cy. I've read some of this already and it looks to be very good." says Conrad.
"I know it is. I spent about three months working on it." says Cy.
"Not bad." says Conrad.
"It's good, I know. Listen, I got something to tell you." says Cy.
"What is it?" asks Conrad.
"Louisa here doesn't believe that my mother is my mother." says Cy.
"Is that true?" asks Conrad to Louisa.
"I doubt it a little." says Louisa.
"Listen to me, Louisa. I know who Cy's mother and it is who he says it is." says Conrad.
"What makes you think so?" asks Louisa.
"I've known her and she taught Cy never to lie about his family." says Conrad.
"Should I take your word for it? After all, you are Cy's friend." says Louisa.
"Trust me, Cy's mother is Debralee Scott." says Conrad.
"I'll make my own judgements on that." says Louisa.
"Come on, Conrad. Back to the story." says Cy.
"Okay, if you insist." says Conrad.
"Now, the first thing we do when we decide to do a play on our show, we go over the story. Now, it is an original tale, already in script form, so it has the needed markings for the radio production crew and staff." says Cy.
"Meaning Cy and me." says Conrad.
"Anyway, this script is then reviewed by the production team and, if it meets the approval of said team, it will be placed into production." says Cy.
"We have no choice in that area." says Conrad.
"Moving on, the next step is casting, where the roles within the story are casted with the appropriate talent. We usually have a small group of actors that we hired to come in and read for the parts needed." says Cy.
"This story only has two parts, which will be filled by me and Cy." says Conrad.
"Must you keep this up?" asks Cy.
"I'm only pointing things out so Joanne and Louisa don't get the wrong idea." says Conrad.
"They know this. Why insult their intelligence?" says Cy.
"Sorry, Cy." says Conrad.
"Now, after all that is done, the production moves into a state of review, where all elements of the production is looked over and figured out." says Cy.
"The sound man and the announcer should be here." says Conrad.
"One of those people is me." says a voice.
The four people at the table turn and see a man standing at the green room door, dressed in a white sport jacket and blue jeans.
"Don!" says Cy.
"Who is that?" asks Joanne.
"This is our announcer, Don Foreman. He does all the announcing when me and Conrad do our theater shows." says Cy.
"I think I'll heard of him before." says Louisa.
"You should. He's the host of The Don Foreman Hour, which airs every Sunday evening at 6:00 pm here on WHYP." says Cy.
"That news show?" says Louisa.
"He does the best summary of the week's events." says Cy.
"They why does he do this for you?" asks Louisa.
"Because he happens to be a fan of those old science fiction radio shows and announces for us when we open the Theater of the Quantum Argonauts, for free." says Cy.
"I enjoy doing things like this." says Don.
"Today, we need you to do a little extra work announcing." says Cy.
"On what?" asks Don.
"A little something I wrote called 'Mars 3'." says Cy.
"Can I see the script?" asks Don.
"Here you go." says Cy as Don walks over, grabs the script from him, and sits down at the table.
"Nice story. I see why you would use it." says Don.
"Why?" asks Conrad.
"Because it has only two roles in it." says Don.
"I guess we don't need to lie to you." says Cy.
"I'll be happy to do the announcing." says Don.
"That's great. Now all we need now is our sound man." says Cy.
"That would be me." says another voice.
"Chester!" says Cy as he spots a man by the door.
"Happy to be here to do this. I think I know why I'm here." says Chester as he walks over to the table.
"I guess we can't keep it a secret." says Cy.
"I'll need to see the script." says Chester.
"Here you go." says Don as he hands the script over to Chester.
"Nice. I think I can give you the sounds you need." says Chester.
"With what?" asks Louisa.
"He has this labtop, which has this program with thousands and thousands of sounds and can even create sounds. He just feeds the sound cues into the program and you got a radio show." says Cy.
"You got it." says Chester.
"I guess you can have your show now." says Louisa.
"Just watch us." says Cy as Chester sits down at the table.
Back at the police station, Polly moves her mop and bucket into the room where the jail cells are located. There are two separate cells in the room. Both are marked with letters, Cell A and Cell B. Eddie, the man brought in this morning, is in Cell A as Polly enters the room.
Polly gets to work on a section of floor as Eddie sits there in his cell.
"Good morning to you." says Eddie.
"Good morning." says Polly.
"I guess the only friend I have at this moment is you, the janitor." says Eddie.
"I don't know if I am." says Polly.
"My name is Eddie." says Eddie.
"Polly's my name." says Polly.
"Well, Polly, can I talk to you?" asks Eddie.
"The last time a prisoner talked to me, he told me about something strange." says Polly.
"This might be strange, to say the least." says Eddie.
"What's it about?" asks Polly.
"Suppose someone comes on to you and you get the idea they love you, only to deny it the next time they see you." says Eddie.
"I wouldn't know." says Polly.
"I bet you wouldn't." says Eddie as his mind returns him to the night of the party.
Various people are engaged in party activities, including Mrs. Berner, who's partaking of a cocktail.
"I think you pushing it with the cocktails." says Dr. Berner, a 41-year-old with graying hair, wearing a checkered coat, black tie, and black dress pants.
"Don't tell me how to drink." says Mrs. Berner.
"I'm not." says Dr. Berner.
"Then let me have some fun." says Mrs. Berner as she walks away.
Mrs. Berner roams around the room a bit, looking at those in attendance. She then spies Eddie, keeping to himself next to a potted plant. Mrs. Berner makes her way over to Eddie and the potted plant.
"Hello there, Eddie." says Mrs. Berner.
"Mrs. Berner. Nice to see you." says Eddie.
"Call me Bea." says Mrs. Berner.
"Okay... Bea." says Eddie.
"You know, Eddie, I've kinda had my eye on you for awhile." says Mrs. Berner.
"You have?" says Eddie.
"I think you're kinda cute." says Mrs. Berner.
"You do?" says Eddie.
"You seem nice to me, unlike my husband." says Mrs. Berner.
"Your husband is a nice man." says Eddie.
"He only cares about his work. I'm just his arm candy." says Mrs. Berner.
"Don't say that." says Eddie.
"It's true. I've had my eye on you for a while." says Mrs. Berner.
"Really?" says Eddie.
"Yes, and I feel a certain connection to you." says Mrs. Berner.
"Well, I guess I could say the same, if just a little." says Eddie.
"I wish I could divorce my husband and marry you." says Mrs. Berner.
"Then why don't you?" asks Eddie.
"Because he feels he owns me. I don't feel safe if I tried." says Mrs. Berner.
"I would protect you." says Eddie.
"Thanks, Eddie." says Mrs. Berner as she starts to wander off, back into the mass of those at the party.
"I still can't see it." says Eddie, his mind returning to the present.
"Maybe she will." says Polly as she continues to mop the floor.
In the main office room, Mrs. Berner is sipping on a paper cup filled with water as Elmer looks on. Elmer looks on for a few minutes until Mrs. Berner feels the presence of Elmer.
"Must you look at me?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"I just wanna know what made you tuwn him down." says Elmer.
"Isn't it obivious?" says Mrs. Berner.
"I don't know." says Elmer.
"Me, neither." says Mrs. Berner as her own mind returns to the events of the next day after the party, where Mrs. Berner is outside, trimming up a flower garden.
As she tries to remove a weed in the garden, Eddie walks his way behind her.
"Hello, Bea." says Eddie.
"Hello... Eddie, is it?" says Mrs. Berner.
"That's right." says Eddie.
"What do you want, Eddie?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"I wanted to talk to you about what you said to me at the party." says Eddie.
"What did I say to you at the party?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"That you had feelings for me." says Eddie.
"I never said that." says Mrs. Berner.
"Yes you did. You told me that I was cute." says Eddie.
"I think I would recall me saying that someone was cute." says Mrs. Berner.
"You were drinking last night. That's probably why you don't remember." says Eddie.
"I have a good memory of what happened last night." says Mrs. Berner.
"Then you would remember how you told me that you were your husband's arm candy." says Eddie.
"I would never things like that about my husband." says Mrs. Berner.
"That's what you told me." says Eddie.
"Then you must have heard wrong." says Mrs. Berner.
"I heard it correctly." says Eddie.
"I don't have feelings for you." says Mrs. Berner.
"Yes you do. You're just denying them." says Eddie.
"Get away from me." says Mrs. Berner.
"You love me, admit it." says Eddie.
"I love my husband. I don't love you." says Mrs. Berner.
"Admit it." says Eddie.
"Go away, or I will call the cops." says Mrs. Berner.
Eddie then walks away in a huff, leaving Mrs. Berner to tend to her garden. Just then, her husband, Dr. Berner, walks out of the house and over to Mrs. Berner.
"What did Eddie want?" he asks.
"Nothing." says Mrs. Berner.
The scene then returns to the present as Elmer refills Mrs. Berner's paper cup.
"Do you have feewings for him at aww?" asks Elmer.
"I don't know." says Mrs. Berner.
"I don't see the pwobwem hewe." says Elmer.
"I don't think my husband would understand it." says Mrs. Berner.
"Bit of a wacist?" asks Elmer.
"He just wouldn't." says Mrs. Berner.
"Excuse me, Mws. Bewnew." says Elmer, who then leaves the room to look for Polly.
Elmer finds Polly leaving the jail cell room with her mop and bucket.
"Powwy, I'm gwad I found you." says Elmer.
"What is it, Elmer?" asks Polly.
"I just tawked to Mws. Bewnew and she might actuawwy have feewings for Eddie." says Elmer.
"Eddie is convinced of the same thing." says Polly.
"I wish thewe was some way for them to see it." says Elmer.
"Give me a few minutes." says Polly.
"Okay." says Elmer as Polly moves off.
Several hours later, at the radio station, recording time for the weekend show arrives.
"This is it, the big moment." says Cy as he and Conrad enter a dark control room, along with Joanne, Louisa, Don, and Chester, armed with his labtop.
The back wall of this control room is lined with old-fashioned equipment and reel-to-rell tape recorders. The sound board is also old-fashioned.
"This, right here, is the little-known secret of WHYP." says Cy.
"What is it?" asks Joanne.
"It's Studio B. A leftover from an earlier time." says Cy.
"What's it doing here?" asks Louisa.
"It's here because Mr. Gold's own heritage." says Cy.
"What do you mean?" asks Louisa.
"Mr. Gold founded this radio station back in the 1960s, when there were a lot of garage bands. Well, he thought he could cash in so he started a record label and had this studio built." says Cy.
"How did find this?" asks Joanne.
"During me and Conrad's first week here, when we were trying to figure out a place to do our weekend show." says Cy.
"We found this place and we decided to do our recorded output here." says Conrad.
"Does Mr. Gold know?" asks Louisa.
"As long as we don't bother with Studio A, we're safe." says Cy.
"I can see why." says Louisa.
"I know it." says Conrad.
"I finally see if you really are the son of Debralee Scott." says Louisa.
"How's my radio performance gonna prove it?" asks Cy.
"I'll know." says Louisa.
"Let's get to work." says Conrad.
Cy and Conrad make their way into the studio, along with Don. The studio itself is filled with all that is needed to do a radio play. A piano lays up against a wall and a small forest of microphones stand in the center. Chester takes his labtop and plugs in a cord into the sound board as he switches on the mikes.
"And now, this week, we thought we'd open the Theater of the Quantum Argonauts a week earlier. Don't worry, today's performance will not harm next week's. This week, we bring you 'Mars 3', written and starring Cy Scott, along with Conrad Harris." says Don.
Back at the police station, Polly rushes her way over to where Elmer, excited over something.
"Elmer, I have an idea." says Polly.
"What is it?" asks Elmer.
"Just take these handcuffs and follow my lead." says Polly as she hands Elmer a pair of handcuffs.
"Okay, Powwy." says Elmer as he takes the handcuffs.
"You go over to Mrs. Berner and I'll take Eddie." says Polly.
"To whewe?" asks Elmer.
"The interogation room." says Polly.
"Okay." says Elmer, who then walks over to where Mrs. Berner is sitting.
"Excuse me, Mws. Bewnew. Chief McIntywe needs to see you in the intewogation woom." says Elmer.
"Okay." says Mrs. Berner as she gets up to follow Elmer.
On the other side of the room, Polly walks over to Eddie.
"Excuse me, Eddie. Chief McIntyre would like to see you in the interogation room." says Polly.
"Okay." says Eddie as he gets up to follow Polly.
Elmer takes Mrs. Berner into the interogation room, followed by Eddie and Polly. As Mrs. Berner and Eddie suddenly eye each other, Polly and Elmer lead them to the table in the middle of the room.
"Put Mrs. Berner in that chair." says Polly as she places Eddie in one chair.
Elmer then sits Mrs. Berner in the chair across the table from Eddie.
"What are you doing?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"This." says Polly, who then takes Eddie's hands and handcuffs them behind the chair.
Elmer then follows suit with Mrs. Berner.
"And now, to make sure you don't get away." says Polly as she walks over and grabs some additional cuffs, this time for their legs.
With Mrs. Berner and Eddie now trapped in their chairs, Elmer and Polly look on.
"Why have you done this?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"We're not leaving until you admit your feelings for Eddie." says Polly.
"What feelings?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"The ones you actually have for Eddie here, not the lies you've said to my uncle." says Polly.
"Go on, Powwy." says Elmer.
"I don't have any." says Mrs. Berner.
"Of course you do. You admitted it to Eddie." says Polly.
"I was drunk." says Mrs. Berner.
"A friend of mine once said that being drunk lets you give the truth about something rather than the lies one normally tells." says Polly.
"That Cy." says Elmer.
"Maybe I have some feeling." says Mrs. Berner.
"Elmer, hold Mrs. Berner's head." says Polly.
"What fow?" asks Elmer.
"I want you to point it at Eddie." says Polly.
"Good idea." says Elmer as he walks over to Mrs. Berner and takes hold of her head.
He then points it at Eddie, so he fills Mrs. Berner's vision.
"Look at him. You must have more than feelings for him." says Polly.
"Maybe." says Mrs. Berner as she tries to push away Elmer.
"Keep that head pointed at Eddie, Elmer." says Polly.
"Okay, Powwy." says Elmer.
Elmer keeps it up for five minutes as Mrs. Berner is forced to stare at Eddie. Eventually, Mrs. Berner's heart and mind are filled with new thoughts.
"Okay, I admit it. I have more than feelings for you, Eddie." says Mrs. Berner.
"You do?" asks Eddie.
"I think I... kinda like you." says Mrs. Berner.
"Admit it." says Polly.
"Okay, the truth is... I kinda love you." says Mrs. Berner.
"You love me?" asks Eddie.
"Ever since the day I first saw you. The reason I didn't say anything is... well, you know my husband." says Mrs. Berner.
"What about Dw. Bewnew?" asks Elmer.
"He's kind of a bigot." says Polly.
"I get it now." says Elmer.
"You don't have to be afraid. I'll protect you." says Eddie.
"Do you mean it?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"I do, because I love you, too." says Eddie.
"How sweet it is." says Elmer.
"You got it." says Polly.
"Can you please remove these cuffs?" asks Mrs. Berner.
"Well... okay." says Polly.
Elmer removes his hands from Mrs. Berner's head and Polly removes the handcuffs from both her and Eddie's hands.
"Thank you for this." says Mrs. Berner.
"Me, too." says Eddie.
The two then gets up and run over to each other.
"Why did I ever deny it?" says Mrs. Berner as the two embrace.
Back at the radio station, Cy and Conrad walk back into the control room after they finish recording their weekend show.
"Another edition of the Theater of the Quantum Argonauts has concluded." says Cy.
"And next week, we do it again." says Conrad.
"This time, we'll have more people and we know what story we're doing." says Cy.
"That was great to see. I've always wondered how they made those old radio shows." says Joanne.
"Well, Louisa, has my performance convinced you of my parentage?" asks Cy.
Louisa looks at Cy and gives a look as she thinks it over.
"Yes, I believe it has. If you say that she is your mother, I believe it." says Louisa.
"What convinced you?" asks Cy.
"Doing your performance, when you made that same face as your mother once did." says Louisa.
"You mean... " says Cy.
"I knew Louisa was a fan of your mother and I wanted to see her offspring." says Joanne.
"But you didn't believe me." says Cy.
"I was testing you. I needed to see you act for me to know." says Louisa.
"I think of all the things I inherited from my mother, my acting skills would be the top of the list." says Cy.
"Well, I guess I'll see you around, Cy." says Louisa as she leaves the room.
"Goodbye from me, too." says Joanne as she follows suit.
"I guess you didn't have to go through this. All you had to do was act for her." says Conrad.
"Well, an actor doesn't do his act anywhere. He needs a stage." says Cy.
"I guess so. Well, another day in the life of the son of Debralee Scott." says Conrad.
"May she rest in peace." says Cy.
Back at the police station, Mrs. Berner and Eddie are sitting in a chair making out in the main office area of the place as Polly, Officer Grace, Chief McIntyre, and Elmer look on.
"I can't believe you, Polly. You actually solved a problem." says Chief McIntyre.
"I just remembered what Cy would do if he were in my place." says Polly.
"However you did it, just remember that Dr. Berner is suppose to be in any minute to check on his wife." says Officer Grace.
"Not fow wong." says Elmer.
Just then, Dr. Berner makes his way into the police station and sees his wife and Eddie making out.
"Bea, what are you doing?" asks Dr. Berner.
"I'm being with my love." says Mrs. Berner.
"But I'm your love." says Dr. Berner.
"I'm just your arm candy." says Mrs. Berner.
"Eddie, you let go of my wife!" says Dr. Berner.
"I will not!" says Eddie.
"Why would do this to me, and with a... a... " says Dr. Berner.
"Can it." says Mrs. Berner.
"If you want each other, fine! Just don't come home tonight." says Dr. Berner, who then storms out of the police station.
"You can stay with me." says Eddie.
"Thanks." says Mrs. Berner.
The two then get up and together, walk out of the police station.
"Well, I think I will make my way home." says Polly.
"I guess I'ww go back to the unempwoyment wine with my fiddwe." says Elmer as he puts it back in the case.
"Elmer, I've decided to get you a job here as my assistant." says Chief McIntyre.
"Thank you, Chief McIntywe." says Elmer.
"You start tomorrow at 6:00 am." says Chief McIntyre.
"I'ww be hewe." says Elmer.
"See you tomorrow then, Elmer." says Polly, who then walks out of the police station.
As she reaches the main sidewalk, she is met by the biking Cy once more.
"Interesting day at work?" asks Cy.
"The usual." says Polly.
"Me, too." says Cy.

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This concludes the sixth episode of the current blog season.

The next episode of The Quantum Argonauts will be posted in two weeks, on December 5. Until then, I'll be seeing ya!